SHARE Atlanta Pregnancy and Newborn Grief Support Friends and Family Share Their Thoughts and Feelings

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"Sharing" Our Stories/Thoughts -

Along this Path

E-mail Exchange - Loving Notes From Family and Friends


When a child dies...many share the grief...

"...We had such plans for you. We had hopes and dreams.

...Your uncle would have taught you his love for cars and
your honarary uncle would have helped your daddy instill
in you his love of sports.

And, Dylan, your grandparents would have given you anything,
for spoiling grandchildren is what grandparents are for.

You were, are, and always will be our much loved son,
grandson, nephew and cousin.

Dylan Thomas wrote, "I said some words to the close and
Holy darkness and then I slept."

Sleep well Dylan. We love you."

Washington DC

All of Jennifer's poem


Letters and Poems

"Christian would be 3 years old this Saturday. I am his grandmother." by Linda (10/97)

"I am writing this even though Rebekah was my neice." by Wendy (10/97)

"A Good Friend Seeks Support for Her Bereaved Friends" (7/97)

"In Loving Memory Of My Niece Kada Joy Alvar" by Paula (2/98)

"A poem for our angel Samantha" by Uncle John (4/98)

"I would like to take this opprotunity to say how much I miss you Sean..." By "Aunt" Lisa (5/98)

"To My Mommy" by a Close Friend (5/98)

"HEAVEN'S CHOICE" by Aunt Naomi (5/98)

"...I place this memorial for Justin David" by Adrianne (1/25/99)

"Darling Madison" by Aunt Farrah Withers (2/21/99)

A note from a bereaved Cousin" by Reinette (2/21/99)

"Baby Conner" by Trevor in Scotland (3/1/99)

"Angel Allison - I have been your mother's sister and best friend for 27 years..." by Kathy (5/19/99)

"I Could not Understand" by Richard - a very special note from a close relative who does understand...(7/13/99)

"...a brief prayer for my sister Connie..." by Tim (8/19/99)

"A Mother's Goodbye" by Tiffany's Cousin in Memory of Gabriel Michael Hancock
BR> "I hope others will join me in praying for my friend, Mary." by Paul (12/20/99)

"My Nephew, Lincoln Jade Moya (1.8.99)" by Jodie (1/2/99)

"In Loving Memory of Renton Travers 21st December 1958" by his sister, Donna

"Timmothy" by Cousin Rhonda (3/17/00)

"Kenlea Faith was so loved and wanted...." by Aunt Stephanie (4/17/00)

"In Loving Memory Of Haley Shyanne Lindsey (7-19-99)~ Our Miracle Niece by Marvin (6/20/00)

"I realized I wanted to hear all along, "Would you like to talk about what happened and how you're feeling?". by Brianna (4/01)

"A Tribute to my cousin, Christina" by Ashley (7/8/01)


I am writing this even though Rebekah was my neice.

The pain my sister, Karen, has gone through tears at my very soul.

Karen knew Rebekah was no longer alive 2 days prior to her due date. She did not say anything. We had just had a loss of a grandmother and she did not want to scare anyone incase her motherly instinct was wrong.

When she went to hospital with cramps, they told her Rebekah was gone. I was not there at the time and received a call from our mother at work. I rushed to be at my sisters side.

After Rebekah was born, we were able to hold her. They put a pink rose on my sisters room. The pain I felt (and still feel) was almost unbearable. I can't imagine what my sister felt.

It seems so senseless and yet the Lord needed Rebekah for something. I know that she is safe in the Lord's arms yet the pain is still there.

My sister had buried her grief until her other daughter turned 2 last month. Then all the pain and anger came out. I am trying to help her deal with this and feel very helpless.

I am not sure too many family members get to voice this kind of story. I love my sister and I pray to the Lord that she will find peace in her heart.

Rebekah Wilkins-Quillman - 04/09/97
Labanon, PA

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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A Good Friend Seeks Support for Her Bereaved Friends

A close friend of mine lost her baby in December 1996 three days after birth to hypoplastic heart condition.

I was looking on the internet to find some kind of help for her. Although my friend has several family members and close friends to be here for her, none of us have experienced the pain of loosing a child so early.

She is understandably grieving. But all of the grieving is causing mass confusion for her. Her husband and her have remarkably grown closer through all of this.

I was wondering if you knew of a SHARE group in ### that might be of help to her. She is a very private person, and at this point has no desire to join a support group. But she may need one in the future.

I feel she needs the companionship of people who can relate to her loss. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Your web page was very touching and my prayers are with all of those who have experienced such a great loss. I feel in my heart that your organization is an asset to many. Thank You for your compassion and words of wisdom. Sincerely, G.

Marcia's Comments:

Thank you for writing and for your kind words of support.

You have already begun to help your friend by realizing her need to grieve. You have sought help for yourself in understanding what is happening, now she needs you to "let her grieve - her way". She needs for you to continue to listen and support her as she asks.

You may wish to run off some of our pages - especially some of the Coping Ideas and offer them to her if she wants to read them - later. She might be open to learning a little more about what she is moving through - especially if she does not feel threatened or hurried.

We at SHARE also appreciate that at the six month place, shock has worn off and the reality of "empty arms" is very strong. So your friend may be having a particularly difficult time right now - and that would be normal.

Sometimes, family and friends are ready to move on right at the time that the mother becomes fully aware of her loss. Hard to believe, but very true. Most parents and the people around them don't realize this fact - that's why understanding grief and groups such as SHARE are so important! Grieving, usually does not end in a few weeks or a few months - a year or more is very normal.

As to a group in your state, please e-mail National SHARE (found in our site in Upcoming Events). They have a huge listing of groups.

Thanks for being such a special friend. Invite her to visit our page - if she wants. Thanks for writing. Marcia

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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In Loving Memory Of My Niece Kada Joy Alvar 12/31/97

Hello my sweet niece,

I never got to see you or ever feel the tummy of your mommy's belly. I miss you dearly...I was thinking of you today and had to call your mom, to cry to her about how much I miss and love you.

Even though it was not me who had you, I can feel the pain that my sister is having. Every time I think of someone having a baby I hurt for her. I cry for her. Knowing that she wanted you so badly. Then I have to think that she will get to see you and hold you one day in heaven. But, for now you can play with Russo. And your great-grandparents. I love you, Kada!!!!!

Hugs and Kisses,

Aunt Paula

Visit Initial Feelings and Reactions to read the loving poem that Kada Joy's mother, Selena, wrote. Visit Notes/West for more of Selena's thoughts.

Aunt Paula
Kada Joy Alvar
Second trimester loss
San Fransico, CA

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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A poem for our angel Samantha

Lift me a little higher lord
for I'm much too small to see
all the wisdom and the wonder
of this world you made for me.

I've only fleeting glimpses
and I want to see it all,
bend down a little closer lord
so that I can grab ahold.

Lift me a little higher lord
so that I can appreciate
the blessings you have bestowed
on me.

For though I stand on my tiptoes
I can barely see.
I want to touch a star or two.

Lift me just a little higher lord
I do not weigh too much you see
if you put me on your shoulders lord
for then I can see it all !!!!!

Samantha's Uncle John wrote this for her and then he went on to say,

"Samantha, mommy and daddy love you with all our hearts and always will !!!!!!!"


Notes/West/Dave and Jackie for some of Jackie's thoughts...

Dave and Jackie
Samantha J Gallerani
Fairfield, CA

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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I would like to take this opprotunity to say how much I miss you Sean.

You were such a beautiful child. I have never seen such a pretty newborn. I was one of the few lucky ones who got to hold you and love you even for a brief moment.

When I heard the news of your death I was greatly affected. Not only was I saddened at the loss of you, but also for the trememdous loss of my close friends, your parents.

Your mom and dad love you very much and so do I. I now have a daughter of my own and I thank God she is able to play with your big brother, Brenden. I know you are looking down from Heaven and smiling on all of us. You are our little angel Sean, and we miss you.

Love you Lots,
"Aunt" Lisa

Died soon after birth

For more thoughts about Sean visit... Healing Mementos, Second Anniversary, and Third Anniversary for other thoughts that Janet has shared with SHARE Atlanta.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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A special poem written by a special friend

To My Mommy

You kept me safe for nine whole months
You did a very good job
But now it's time for me to go
I know you feel that you've been robbed

You may not understand this
But I felt your tender touch
And even though I could not respond
It meant so very much

You did your best to comfort me
To make me feel safe inside
But now it's time to say good-bye
And let god be my guide.

I'll always love you Mommy
And I'll love my Daddy too
But now instead of you watching over me,
I'll be watching over you.

Written by a close friend -MKP

Raymond Bennett Ketelsen-Grube
Seattle, WA

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Goodbye our little Courtney,
Though we'll never know your smile
God did let us see and hold you
For just a little while

You were perfect from the outset,
Set to walk untrodden sands
A world of wonder to explore,
But God had other plans

Though we'll never know your laughter,
Though we'll never dry your tears
You'll be in our hearts as comfort,
Through our continued years

Your tiny fingers wound their way
Around your family's hearts
Your fragile face besotted those
Who held you in their arms

From your perfect face and features
To your delicate hands and toes
Its really hard to fathom why
You're the one that Heaven chose

And we all gain little comfort
From God's choice to take you, Dear,
That choice has shattered everyone
As we'd rather you were here

In fondness shall we hold you,
In sadness we will pray
That God had special reasons
For taking you away

A sadness has enveloped all,
And tears will flow forever
But Courtney we all love you so
We will not forget you, ever.

Naomi Crocker

Courtney, our firstborn, died from severe metabolic acidosis 20 hours after birth. Naomi, the aunt after whom Courtney was named, wrote this poem in her memory.

You asked if it would be OK to put "Heaven's Choice" on to the Family and Friends page - that would be great. And I'll let my sister, Naomi, know. She's my twin - she still doesn't know how to help me or John, but her poem has helped us a lot. We also used it as part of Courtney's funeral service. I know that Naomi will be pleased if she can reach out and support others as well.

For Courtney's story visit ~ "Our Guardian Angel" by Roanne (5/31/98) and for more of Roanne's thoughts visit Notes from Around the World - Roanne/Gosford, NSW/5/98

Courtney Naomi McNamara
Died soon after birth
Gosford, NSW

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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I have placed this memorial in honour of my good friends Jody and Dave and their son who went to walk with God on Jan. 12, 1999.

Visit Dedications Lovingly Made in January-March '99.

Second trimester loss

Marcia's thoughts: Dear Adrianne, I am sorry about your friends loss of Justin David on January 12, '99. I put your loving dedication to Justin on our Memorial Garden/Dedications Lovingly Made January-March '99 tonight. I think it is very special that you have reached out in support of Jody and Dave in their time of need.

Please be gentle with yourself, too, at this time. The loss of a baby touches so many...all then must gently watch their steps as they grieve this loss. Supporting one another is so very important.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Darling Madison

Today I may lay your body down to rest for eternity;
But your soul will always be alive with me.

Keeping you in my heart is something I will always do;
Because Madison you are my daughter and I love you.

Every night I see you in my dreams;
Growing up before me; From a baby to a little girl.

My dreams are now our own little world;
For us to visit and to love ;
Till that day I can be with you again in the world above.

My sister, Farrah Withers, wrote this poem for me and Madison.

Madison Jeanne Withers-Gow
Thorton, CO

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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A note from a bereaved Cousin

I am not the parents, I am a cousin who is hurting at the core. I didn't understand, I thought Leslie's death was a one of a kind quirk.

But after visiting your site and reading about other parents who have experienced the same type of loss, I am gaining a sense of understanding. Thank you very much.

Lexington, KY


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Baby Conner

This is for baby Conner of Virginia, USA who died on 1st February before his mother knew he existed. I want her to know that there are folks who feel for her even if they cant pretend to know what she is going through. Trevor ~ Perth, Scotland

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Angel Allison - I have been your mother's sister and best friend for 27 years. I was first to know about you, and first to see you when you were born. You are a beautiful little angel that I will hold in my heart forever. Love, Auntie Kath

Allison Marie Tortora
Barre, MA

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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I Could not Understand

Please let me relate this rather long story. I can remember it today as if it only happened yesterday.

My sister called up to visit us - we lived about a mile from each other and my sister and my wife are as close as REAL sisters and not sisters-in-law. I was ushered into the sitting room while my sister and Maureen, my wife, discussed womens' things.

Why we men are not allowed to eavesdrop on these conversations has always puzzled me. Anyway, I knew better than to question either of them. My sister did seem to be somewhat upset and I thought she might be wanting a lift somewhere or maybe she was going to ask if we'd look after her dog for a few days. I thought of everything but the real thing.

After about fifteen minutes Maureen came into the sitting room and quitely told me that our niece, my sister's daughter, had lost the baby she had been carrying. I was quite upset as I always liked my niece a great deal and knew she was looking forward to having this little baby.

My wife said that she and my sister were going down to my sister's house and that they would be back soon. They did indeed return within half an hour and they had our niece with them.

I was quite surprised as I was of the opinion that she should be in hospital. (What do we men know?!) I called Maureen to one side and said "I thought you said Eleanor (our niece) had lost the baby". This was because, looking at her she still appeared extremely 'pregnant'. Maureen explained to me that the little baby had died inside of our niece. She further explained that our niece would have to be taken into hospital at some future date where she would be induced to deliver her 'dead' baby. This was really too much for me.

I could not undersdtand how a woman could bear that amount of pain, that excess of diappointment, that torture of having to go into a hospital, occupy a bed adjacent to other women who unlike you, would give birth to a baby while you would go through pain and heartache to deliver something that God had taken from you. These thoughts stayed with me for quite some time after that day. No matter what I did, I could not get them out of my mind.

When this has happened to me before I always found that once I put what I am feeling on to paper, the pain eases and eventually goes away altogether. That was how I came to write this little poem.

I imagined that I was my niece and that I had lost this little baby. I hope you don't find my little poem offensive.

A Lament for My Baby

I never got to hear you laugh
You never saw me cry
'Didn't get a chance to say 'Hello'
You never said 'Goodbye

I didn't think that I could feel
So sad, lost and forlorn
I never knew God chose his Angels
Before some of them are born.

Your life was short yet special
I shared it all exclusively
I felt you breathe, I felt you kick
You were alive inside of me.

Every baby is an Angel
And every Angel is divine
God needed one in Heaven
He came down and he took mine

And although we're not together
We're not really apart
For you'll always occupy a space
Deep within my heart.

Time has begun to ease my pain
It's only some days now I cry
When I wish I could have said 'Hello'
And heard you say 'Goodby'


Nieces baby -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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...a brief prayer for my sister Connie...

Please say a brief prayer for my loving sister Connie. She has had the misfortune of becoming pregnant and then having the babies heart stop during her first trimester. This resulted im a miscarrige. Another sad piece of information is that I believe it to be the second or third time this has happened.

I grieve for her loss, and hope that she may find hope for the future of her trying again. Please if just for a brief moment ask the good lord to help her through this. Thank you all for you help, sincerely... Tim

chunk aka. connie
Brookfield, WI

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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A Mother's Goodbye

I named you after an angel, son,
Because that is what I see.
When I look into your face my son
You are beautiful to me.

They wouldn't let me touch you, son
Until your last few hours
And through your face I saw shining,
God and all his powers.

I love you with all my heart, son,
And I've done the hardest thing.
I'll ever have to do, my son,
But I hope your heart will sing.

I'm releasing you from earth son,
From the pain that awaits you here.
I'm giving you pure to God my son,
But the pain will kill me, I fear.

I'll never have to ground you, son.
Or wash your dirty clothes.
But I won't be able to hug you, son,
Or watch you in your repose.

So goodbye, my son, I love you.
I can't think of things to say,
Except that I won't forget you, son
Until on my death bed I lay.

Written by my cousin especially for my son and I,
and read at his funeral.

Gabriel Michael Hancock
Sept 27-30 1999
Died soon after birth
Portland, OR

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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I hope others will join me in praying for my friend, Mary.

I have a good friend of mine whose child, Erin, died right after birth. This was five years ago but she is still grieving deeply.

I don't think many people can understand what the parents go through, especially the mother. Her friends don't understand and either distance themselves or send her pictures of their new, healthy babies.

I don't think anyone ever completely gets over a loss such as this. It's hard to come to terms and start moving forward in life again. I hope others will join me in praying for my friend, Mary. I hope you find peace and are able to start living again.

Atlanta, GA

Marcia's thoughts: Bless you for being such a supportive friend of your friend Mary. We all need people like you when we are hurting. I believe that the holidays plus other unknowns (or things we're not aware of) can cause renewed sense of loss and grief.

You are correct when you say we never get over something like this, but we do have choices as to how we cope with our loss and grief. We spend much time discussing these options in our group and on this website. It does take an awareness by the grieving person that they want to work through their grief and then search for options. A supportive listener is one of the most important ways a person can heal.

Know that you can gently offer Mary options when she seems ready - options that will allow her to work through her grief, not deny it. Sometimes folks become ready to read the information on the site or call for it which then opens other windows for healing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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My Nephew, Lincoln Jade Moya (8.1.99)

My nephew Lincoln was stillborn at 23 weeks gestation due to a Strep B infection in the uterus. He was to be the first child for my brother and his partner and the third grandson for my parents.

We really felt him missing from our Christmas celebrations this year and as my own two sons grow older I am sad that they don't have their little cousin with them.

It's a helpless feeling being the big sister and not being able to take away the pain I know he still very much feels.

Entry #2 1/24/00: Thank you so much for your E-Mail. I apologise for the error I made in recording Lincoln's birth date - I realise now how the date is read differently in the US. Lincoln was still-born on August 1st 1999.

I have only just discovered the Share Atlanta website and already has made a difference in my life. Its a wonderful feeling to know that support and understanding is only a key stroke away - from people who know exactly how much and how deeps it hurts to lose a child. I hope to get in touch with others and continue to enjoy the helpful thoughts and experience of other parents on the web site.

Warmest Regards, Jodie Jodie
Lincoln Jade Moya
August 1, 1999
Mater Mothers Hospital, Brisbane

Marcia's thoughts: No one can take the pain away but by listening and understanding that their pain is there...and still there a year later is very important. It helps both you and your family members know that their special baby is forever in your hearts and souls and missed. So often those around the bereaved parents either forget or don't remember to share their feelings. It's okay to share...the support is needed on both sides.

Bless you as you continue to grieve...especially at the anniversary. It may help you to read some about Anniversaries on our site. If you haven't, reading "Allowing Grief to Happen to Heal" might also help.

Most of all, know how special it is that you "the big sister" still remembers and wishes to be supportive at this means much.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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In Loving Memory of Renton Travers 21st December 1958

A Chrismas Angel

Renton Travers Son of Leonie, now with her baby in heaven, and Neville. An angel remembered with love by his sister Donna and his niece, Emily, who would have liked to know her uncle Renton. xxxxxxxx

Though many years have passed,
we remember you still,
though death ended your life,
our relationship, end, it never will.

Renton Travers
New Zealand

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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On Dec.27th 1999 Timmothy JR. was forced to come into this world just 2 weeks earlier than planned. His mother(Stacey) and father(Tim) were driving to there usual Dr.apt and on the way there a woman had pulled out in front of them and they couldn't do anything to stop.

The woman who pulled out in front of them died on the sceen, and Stacey was rushed to the hospital with a broken feemer, (she was due with little Timmothy in just 2 weeks). Tim her husband stayed by her side the whole time. Stacey needed surgery on her leg so they had to deliver baby Timmothy.

After birth Timmothy lived a very short 50 mins, due to the car accident. He was in this world a very short time and touched so many lives in that time. It was the saddest thing in this world.

This was Stacey's 3rd pregnancy. The other 2 she lost due to misscarrages. This time she was home free to a healthy baby boy - until that fatal day, Dec 27th, 1999.

I'm her cousin and it's very hard for me to handle the loss let alone imagine their feeling of pain.

To plan for a new baby and before you know it life's turn to something so terrible in one split second. To then have to plan your baby's funeral is heart wrenching.............:(

To baby Timmothy, someone so little who has touched so many peoples lives. Everyone love's you. And You will always be in our hearts.

Parents Tim & Stacey.. I'm Staceys cousin Rhonda
Timmothy Holcomb JR.
DEC. 27, 99
Died soon after birth

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Kenlea Faith was so loved and wanted....

My brother and sister-in-law have twin boys from IVF, and wanted another child. After undergoing the physical and emotional turmoil of IVF again, they found they were was discovered the baby was a girl!!! Such a perfect ending..she was due July 12, 2000.

Tonya (my sil) had preterm labor, and was sent home after a hospital stay. Three days layer I took her for a routine visit. There was no heartbeat. She was devastated, and I just held her in disbelief. I tried to comfort her, what could I say except, "I love you, and I'm sorry..".

She says I was such a comfort. I am glad I helped. On Sunday, April 9,2000, my perfect, beautiful, and so still niece entered the world. She was 1 pound, 11 ounces, and 13 pretty. We held her,and kissed her little cheeks.

Her service was beautiful, and I know she is in Heaven, but we all miss her so..Little Kenlea Faith Kelly..stay gold ....

Love forever,
Aunt Stephanie

Kenlea Faith Kelly
Paris, IL

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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In Loving Memory Of Haley Shyanne Lindsey (7-19-99)

Our Miracle Niece

Haley was a child that was born with no brain, but survived 7 hours without any machines. Because of this we call her Our Miracle Niece. We never got to meet her while she was alive, but we know that she is in our hearts for a lifetime.

Babies die day after day, but you would never think that it would happen to you are someone in your family, but once it does the pain is there forever. So we hope and pray for each and everyone of you who has lost a child or a famliy member.

Aunt Crystal & Uncle Marvin

Haley Shyanne Lindsey
Died soon after birth

Marcia's thoughts: Haley was indeed a Miracle Niece and Baby. Our son Seth also had her condition and we will always treasure his presence in our family. If you would like to you can read about him under "Marcia's story" in the drop down box. There are other stories about babies born with anencephaly on our site under Sharing Stories, Personal Stories and Medical Issues/Baby Congenital - Anencephalic.

It is very special when relatives express such sincere and special thoughts such as you have in your message. It means much. I know from all I read, hear, etc. that the loss of a baby causes pain for other family members as well as the "mom and dad". So be gentle with yourselves as well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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My Miscarriage Experience

I suffered a miscarriage during my fifth month of pregnancy. I was so excited to finally be over the half-way point when I suddenly came down with an severe infection which lead to me losing my baby, Kaleb.

I was really depressed because this was my first pregnancy and I had gone on a baby shopping frenzy. Coming home after a week in the hospital, I saw a beautiful baby room with every toy and baby book imaginable. Except I didn't have a baby to occupy it anymore.

I felt as though noone understood what I was going through, so I tried to isolate myself from family and friends. Many people tried to comfort me by saying things like "You'll be able to fill that baby room soon". But to me I just wanted to scream, "Well I had a baby to fill it and I want that baby back." I knew they were trying to help, but I just wanted to be alone.

The first two months were so hard to get through. The hospital gave me a baby book with pictures and foot prints but it took me almost a month to even be able to open it. Then when I finallly did, I cried every time.

Finally, after three months of trying to isolate myself, my husband stepped in and said the one thing that I realized I wanted to hear all along, "Would you like to talk about what happened and how you're feeling?".

Now it's been a year and a half. I still have days where I think about what happened and I still get sad.

After sharing my feelings with family, I realized my mom went through the same unfortunate experience and just never liked to talk about it. Now she and my husband are my support team whenever I get sad and depressed.

It really helps to just talk about it. Share your feelings and cry on someone shoulder. There's nothing worse than holding things in and blaming yourself. "Do you want to talk about it"--Those were some magic words!

Second trimester loss

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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A Tribute to my cousin, Christina

This tribute is to Christina my little cousin I never got to see her, but I know she was beautiful from pictures. I still wish I could see her, but I know I can't. I do know that one day she will be in my arms, and I will love just as much now as I will then.

Ashley King
Christina Marie King
Riverdale, Ga

Marcia's Comments: We realize that when a baby dies, many people are influenced by this loss. I appreciate your pain of losing your baby cousin, and I think it is very special that you have reached out in your grief to remember Christina and to find support for yourself.

If you call our number, we will send you, a "Parent's Packet" that has some information that may aid you as you work through your grief about the loss of your cousin. It is filled with information about our local groups, and includes a helpful booklist and information about grief. You also will receive a years subscription to our newsletter at no charge.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Forever in Our Hearts~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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