Initial Meetings...

Larry and Marcia continued the group meetings at the Link. Anne, Carol and Marcia manned the phones and Jane worked on publicity. A new member who came from HAND in California, Lily Adams, Larry, and Anne wrote and printed the first SHARE Atlanta brochure in 1985.

By the end of 1985, our initial volunteer group had been depleted by Jane and Carol's need to attend to family issues, and Anne moved in late 1986 or so. Fortunately, though, many of our newest members were ready to begin outreach. So the group grew!

Stone Mountain and Piedmont Meeting..

In late 1985, we branched out with a group in Stone Mountain co-led with Larry and Robert and Roberta Kohen (our very first SHARE Atlanta members). Marcia still led the Link group. Then in 1986, SHARE Atlanta parents, Cathy Steele and Linda Anderson, began a SHARE Atlanta group at Piedmont hospital where Larry was a chaplain.

Two nurses, Mary Ellen Vollrath and Barbara Carr, who continued the group from Cathy and Linda in late 1986 became RTS trained in 1989. The group became a "RTS" group in the summer of 1991.

Women's Group

As the men and women's group was growing and changing, the women's group was begun in October of 1985 at Jean Shulman's home (led by Marcia McGinnis) then split into 4 groups. These four groups were: in Stone Mountain (Mary Rice and Roberta Kohn); Northlake (Jean Schulman); and Marietta (Linda Colemen). Because it was decided that the women needed a constant location and facilitator, it became "one" again in the summer of 1986 at Marcia's home. It still meets there each month.

Subsequent Pregnancy Group and Baby/Family Reunions

Our successful grief support meetings led to the need to support parents who chose a subsequent pregnancy. Our first Subsequent Pregnancy group was held in 1986 by Lily Adams and co-led by SHARE Atlanta mom, Nancy Schultz. The meetings were topic directed to keep a focus on the discussion. Husbands joined during the last meeting. (Just as we do today.) By 1987, Pam took the Subsequent Pregnancy group over, and it was held in Donna Bondi's home near Emory and Fernbank.

We celebrated these new pregnancies and then the new arrivals in our newsletter and in a "Baby Reunion." The first few were held in Marcia's home beginning in February 1986. The second one Pam Slayback decribes as a "true celebration" was in December 1987 with 17 families and new babies!! Kathleen Blum held many of our "Family Reunions" in their home over the years.

Business Meetings and incorporation and tax exemption...

SHARE Atlanta's, first business meeting was held at Piedmont Hospital, January 21, 1986, and Marcia McGinnis was elected president. The recorded members present included: Roberta and Tom Kohn, Diane Jordan, Pam Slayback (treasurer), Lily Adams, Jean Shulman, Jean Burditt, and Eileen Wischusen.

The business meetings became more structured with incorporation completed by Att. John Bender, a SHARE Atlanta dad, on April 14, 1987. Our by-laws had been worked on by Jean Burditt and Jean Shulman. Our first official board meeting, January 30, 1988 was small, but official positions were: Marcia McGinnis, pres.; Pam Slayback, treas.; Eve McIntosh, sec. Then, Pam Slayback worked for our tax-exemption status effective as of August 2, 1988.

All are invited to our business meetings...

SHARE Atlanta's meetings consist of the board who are volunteers working as coordinators for our various programs, and any volunteer who wishes to join us. Through the years, the SHARE Atlanta volunteers collective care and concern, for the bereaved parents included in the Pregnancy and Newborn Loss Community, has been demonstrated by their ongoing devotion to make SHARE Atlanta a supportive and effective group.

Inservices, written materials and media...

Inservice presentations...as early as 1985

The need to spread the word about support was immediately realized by our members. Why? Because we had benefitted from the support given to us.

Informal inservices began in 1985. Often with visits by a member to "their" hospital. As our information packets (printed materials about pregnancy loss) and our brochure became availabe, they became an important part of our visits.

Our inservice efforts expanded as our members were included on panels with Parent-to-Parent and Premie Parents' members. These panels were at Northside, Piedmont, and Shallowford. Also, several informal talks to small nursing staff groups were presented.

Inservice and Media...1986

The first of 12 television outreach programs was in January 1987: Cable News Network (CNN): Health Week. Charlotte and Neal Faulkenberry, Jean and Bob Schulman, Tim and Sandy Spaeth, had been the panel for a Resolve Through Sharing Certification Course in November 1986. They discussed the importance of mementos, caring and having others say and do 'the right thing' after a loss. CNN was present.

CNN wanted to learn more about how couples dealt with grief so they returned to each couple's home and interviewed them. The program was aired three times and on a Saturday special on January 10, 1987. Thus, our first media presentation came from an inservice that our parents did for RTS. Through the years, shows included many of our members and their stories. Many were filmed in Marcia McGinnis' family room.

Focus on inservice and promotional programs..

Structured inservice and promotional programs were better developed by Karen Gipson beginning in 1994. Karen carried our program to new heights and reached many by getting information out on radio, television, flyers, and newspaper. She also strengthened our relationship with caregivers. Karen Major worked along side of Karen for many years. Inservice activites are key to making our outreach known to the community, and we knew this from the beginning.

First brochure...1985

For information about our group, our first SHARE Atlanta brochure was designed in September 1985 by Lily Adams, Larry Connelly, and Anne Thrift. This project plus a need to bank some of the donations by willing members, brought us to our first banking budget. Anne and Doug Thrift opened our account in Trust Company in September 1985. Our second printing of 3000 brochures for $85 was made in February 1986.

For more information, Kate Bissel in 1987 bound 15 of our books that held articles, and the background and mission of SHARE Atlanta, and Piedmont helped run them off. These contained some articles about pregnancy loss. There were not many books on the topic at this time so we were pulling together as many articles as we could to validate and support our issues. We used these in inservices and for groups.

Remembering our special children...

First Annual Candlelighting in December 85

Our first candlelighting was in December 1985 at Indian Creek Baptist Church in Stone Mountain by Tom and Roberta Kohn and other members of SHARE Atlanta. Annual candlelightings followed and were held in the McGinnis' home. The candlelightings in December were always a potluck dinner, a getting to know you activity, and then the lighting of our candles in memory of our babies. The Women's Candleligting in November grew out of the desire of our women to share time together in memory of our babies. These began in November 1986.

October Awareness with Walk to Remember..1989

On October 15, 1989, we held our first Memorial service, at Springdale Park, on Ponce De Leon. It was a "Walk to Remember" with the planting of an oak tree at the corner of Springdale and Ponce. The program was coordinated by Joanna Merwin, Diane Jordan, Melody Werner, and Esther Gutierrez. There was a small orchestra that played as we walked and placed pieces of paper with the names of our babies in the soil around the tree.

The walk was our first October Pregnancy and Infant Awareness event and cooresponded with the Walk to be held in Washington D.C. that year. Larry Connelly, Pam Slayback and Marcia McGinnis each spoke briefly. It was attended by about 100 members.

Social gatherings of SHARE Atlanta parents...

Social gatherings by our members happened because they felt safe with other group members. Together we knew what to say and what not to say...until we could heal. These gatherings gave us a happy place to be together.

Our first gathering was for a picnic at Linda and Larry Connelly's house October 85. Joan Dewar was honored with a necklace from SHARE Atlanta/AMEND members. Then, we had a Valentine's gathering in February 16, 1986, where SHARE Atlanta parents (Nafzigers, Spaeths, Rice, Kaplan, Drew, McIntosh, Slayback, McGinnis) shared time together and Joan joined us. These were the first of many social gatherings and led to the retreats we later had at Clare Weaver family's lake home.

Our parents still gather together in social settings and outreach efforts - for support and comfort. Sharing, and, yes, an easy laughter, helps dads and moms deal with their many confused feelings and fears. A very normal need during a very difficult and painful time. The peace that can be gathered from these times together carries parents through difficult months and lets them know that they are not alone.

Many of the relationships established during these times are lasting ones.

AMEND and SHARE Atlanta had a common mission with the same ultimate goals...

During the early 80s, being together in AMEND, gave to us bereaved parents what SHARE Atlanta has continued to hope to do through the years. Basically, those who had experienced the pain of pregnancy loss provided comfort and support to one another. Our healing efforts were focused on regaining our hope so we could make new subsequent choices.

We are not alone ... our pain in grief is normal

What we have come to realize is that a group such as ours keeps our losses on a personal level. The pain of loss and the subsequent grief is not necessarily a clinical situation. We learn that the grieving process is a normal part of dealing with loss. The process helps us heal. Parents support each other as they move through their grief (especially during the first year).

The group provides an understanding of how to deal with grief with ideas for coping. Parents are seeking the ultimate ability to make new choices - whatever that means for parents on their path. For most of us, our lasting and ever present desire is to come to a place where we can celebrate a new life as we bring a subsequent baby into our family.

Marcia McGinnis, 1/2005