SHARE Atlanta Pregnancy and Newborn Grief Support Sibling Grief

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The following was written by Martha O.,
the daughter of Claire O., a SHARE Atlanta parent.
Martha's sister Mary Francis O. was born and died on August 7, 1989.

A Child's Point of View

On August 7, 1989 my mom had a baby girl. She died ten hours later. I was there at the birth. I was nine years old. This is how it happened.

On August 6th at about 6:00 am, my mom woke me up and said, "I'm in labor." Even though I was tired I hopped out of bed.

When I was eating my breakfast I ate it as fast as possible. My uncle came over and took care of my brother and sister.

When we were at the hospital there was a baseball game on. My dad said that who ever was up at bat when the baby was born - that's what we would name it(he was just kidding). When the baseball game was over the baby still wasn't born.

I was getting tired, but I wasn't going to fall asleep. At 1:30 am a baby girl was born. I cut the cord. Then the nurse put a stethoscope on the baby's heart and then she took her over to a special bed. Then they took her to the nursery. I went home because I had been up for a long time. When we got home I was surprised I could sleep. The crib was right next to my bed. I kept thinking of a baby in there.

When I woke up my uncle was still at our house. He said my dad had gone to a different hospital with the baby, but my mom was coming home that morning. I went to a birthday party with my sister(and brother, I think). When we came home my dad was home. He told us that she had died.

We had a maid come and help around the house. A lot of relatives came to the funeral. My best friend's mom had a baby about a month before my mom had hers.

I really wanted a baby brother or sister. And I was very upset. I think it was the hardest on me and my mom. Now I know not to hope for something so much.

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